Any thesis on why 24 teams should never have been permitted in the European Championship finals must feature this game.

On a stiflingly hot evening in Bavaria, Denmark and Serbia did absolutely nothing to prove the expansion of this tournament has enhanced entertainment levels. The occasion was notable for Christian Eriksen winning his 133rd cap, a record for a male Danish player, and … that was about it.

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© Photograph: Fabrice Coffrini/AFP/Getty Images

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© Photograph: Fabrice Coffrini/AFP/Getty Images

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Mac Millings gets in touch: “John dearest,. Well, here i am, at the Allianz Munich Football Arena. Consider me your inside man (I mean, apart from the proper journalist your Super Soaraway Guardian actually has on the inside -- I’m seated under the media centre, by the way, and am waving in the direction of...I don’t know...Jonathan Wilson?) Anyway, great atmosphere already, Danes outnumbering Serbs by a wide margin, but all very convivial, and a joyous reaction from all concerned when the PA announced that Austria had beaten the Dutch. Updates as I get them.”

Anders Van Bruun gets in touch: “The Guardian’s coverage of Denmark’s first game mistook Victor Kristiansen (“VK”) and Rasmus Nissen Kristensen (“RK”). It was VK who played and gave the goal away, RK has yet to play a minute in Germany, despite the player rating attributed to him. In the hope of a resounding Danish win (but realistically a nervy 2-1).”

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© Photograph: Miguel Medina/AFP/Getty Images

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© Photograph: Miguel Medina/AFP/Getty Images

Aussies taste-test the spicy ramen that's too hot for Denmark.

"Time is not your friend when it comes to this." "I have sweaty eyelids!" "I've dropped some on my hand. That might need treatment." Come for the excellent Korean packaging! (NB: contact the Poison Line if children show "acute symptoms".)